Throw the wedding bouquet away: get rid of traditional wedding superstitions
how you should break traditions to create your future
Remember when you were young, whether you were blasting rock music or spending your days in your favourite book shop, planning your wedding was about you and what you wanted to do. So why stop now?
Weddings in the last 10 years have evolved to become celebrations of love for everyone, not just the stereotype. For too long people have been confined to century old wedding traditions or superstitions to determine if their future will be happy or not what they have wanted to do. lets ditch the supersitstions an celebrate love and being free with each wedding in your couples unique way, to create your married couples unique iconography to the world free from judgement or fear. For example white was been the colour of choice for in japan brides years before queen victoria popularised it. A wedding day mishap can be determined as a sign of luck, it's about how you take the signs that are steeped in tradition and history and make them your own.
Breaking the mould: the rise of non-traditional weddings
Wearing a black wedding dress to express your inner goth yes please! The traditional white dress and cookie cutter vows are out. You and your partner can break the glass ceiling by having both of you walk down the aisle or switching out your wedding rings for something more fun, to express how you feel with elements of nostalgia and grace to paint the day with your proud colours of love.
Over the last decade LGBTQ+ weddings have and are leading the change breaking stiff traditions according to The London Evening Standard by 2018 LGBTQ+ weddings had reached almost 121,000, before hitting 167,000 in 2023. Thea Jaydillistone an LGBTQ+ believes ‘weddings are unique to the couple it changes depending on the wedding’. As Weddings are about celebrating each couples individuality by not being confined to the norms celebrities and people across the globe have decided to have fun with alternative venues where couples have first met or wearing fun eco-friendly vintage outfits, with shops such as the ballroom emporium in oxford offering alternative twists no non traditional wedding attire, smashing the concepts of the big white dress and formal suit and tie.
Redefining nostalgia: making new traditions for you
Nostalgia is fun, so don't let this article stop you from incorporating traditional elements into your wedding as it is your day! You would edit a family recipe if you didn't like to suit you so why wouldn't you do that with your grandma's blue or brothers bow tie. You don't have to blindly throw away customs, you can edit them and use this article as inspiration to create your own fresh perspective to add a twist on the norms, as wedding superstitions have proven to not determine your future. You have the power of creating a personalised ritual blending you and your partner's family together for life.
Shake up concepts, walk down the aisle to you and your couples favourite song, have a mixed gendered bridal party. Many young people much like Thea are choosing to create their own powerful blended traditions as she stated she didn't like how ‘Holy matrimony, the part of the vows which is like obeying’ she further stated ‘many people choose to cut that out which is good because it is incredibly outdated’. She explained to me later how she will not ‘obey’ her partner as she will be in an equal relationship in the future. Before the societal pressure to conform to weddings is placed upon a bride or groom you may have wanted your wedding to be similar to Theas, so take her as inspiration to live up to your childhood dreams once more.
Future bride Shara Murray - ‘i will definitely get more female voices in the wedding reception and have my maid on honour make a speech to’
Smashing the uncontrollable
Passing a nun or a monk on your wedding day, your marriage will inevitably fail. Wait what but you're marrying the love of your life? Some wedding omens or superstitions are uncountable even out of the wedding planner's hands, however it depends on how you view the sign is up to you in determining the future of your marriage.
One of the oldest and most uncontrolled superstitions to bring your future bad luck is rain on your wedding day. For you and your partner it may mean your guests and outdoor venue gets drenched, however in hindu culture it is seen as a good luck and blessing, furthermore in Native American culture it is a sign of fertility and growth. Signs are controllable or not, we can interpret them as not one fixed meaning or statue, however on your wedding day you should choose to embrace the rain or shine to create your own luck. A future bride Sarha Murray ‘i would be disappointed if it rained on my wedding day buy i would definitely embrace it and get some cute umbrella pictures’.
Devoting your love for your partner whether alone or in front of an audience is a big feat, and one that is brushed over too lightly. Your wedding can be scary so make it comfortable for you. Signs and superstition hold history and narratives to our lives however some are outdated.
By smashing gender norms, enabling financial freedom and creating less pressure are all benefits of why people choose to be authentically them on their wedding day, and let their younger selves free. As Thea expressed ‘at this point we have all been to a church with a big white dress. I want to do something that is more personal’. Pay homage to your younger self whilst also connecting with your present to create new and old traditions away from the pressure of a pre decided future.
Great read Libby and really insightful. Definitely a much better way at looking a life, esepcially on such a significant day !!
Why care what people think or stick to what we think is 'right' - 'it depends on how you view the sign is up to'' love it !!